No Gold Medal

Sweet memories are flooding back. I have all these memories of my childhood, my family, and just being little-when all you worried about was finding your shoes, and not slamming the door on the way out (or leaving it open too long, or you hear, "Shut the door!"). I have found some cousins I haven't seen in absolute ages (amounts to about 20 years, give or take?). They were beautiful things I adored getting together with-just to play at Grandma's house. It just takes me back to visits, eating with extended family, my grandma's pork chops, her letting me make the mashed potatoes, playing out back on her stained concrete (before it was in style), spending the night in her room with the windows open listening to the train or the cicadas, sitting in her old crabapple tree out front, pretending it was a fort, or collecting a coffee can (remember those?) full of crabapples to do nothing with. Oh, happy times. Now the tree is gone, the house is sold, my grandma is in Heaven, but I have my pocket full of memories. Memories no one can take away. Things turn golden over time, don't they? I'm so glad.

There was a time when I spent the night with my grandma and I was in sixth grade. I was supposed to go to the Little Olympics the next day. My grandma drove me dutifully to the field where the games were, and I'd practiced so hard for two weeks, and (as I remember) I had the fastest time (or one of the fastest times?) of the other kids who were practicing for the obstacle course. My grandma pulled up and parked, and I couldn't get out. I don't know what happened. I don't know if I knew she was going to drive away alone (and geez, she didn't even drive across Hwy 71Business, and she was on the other side of it! and how would she get home alone?), she couldn't stay (for fear?), or if I was scared to get out and go up there alone. I don't know. All these things flashed through my head: my team not winning without me, me not finding my school/team/friends, me alone, my grandma alone, the afternoon I'd miss with her if I stayed. It was all too much. I just sat frozen in the car (back when you could sit in the front seat. And maybe not even wear a seat belt?). She just said, "Let's go home." And we did. I felt awful: for my team, for my fear, for my grandma, for how things would go in life. I just had this feeling. I had a good afternoon, and we went to the library (our usual), and she shared her love of books with me, and we probably had frozen pizza and refrigerated Reese's. Two things I don't eat now without remembering her. Anyway, I wouldn't trade the afternoon for anything now. Gold medal, or no.

So, this brings me back to my cousins. I love them, and I love that we share history. And the blood of family. It seems I have less family every year, so I cherish what I have while I have it. I hope my kids carry some history on to their kids. Don't you wonder what little things will stick in their minds?

What memories do you still carry around?

A few more of mine: Eagles blaring in the car-me in the back seat, getting Nerds at the gas station, washing dishes with an apron, fingerpainting on the sidewalk (yes, on paper), playing dolls, playing Star Wars, more music: Johnny Lee, Oliva Newton John, Princess Diana's wedding, roast beef, carrots, and potatoes, chocolate pies, old cars, no air conditioning, the Dukes of Hazzard, Love Boat and Fantasy Island, Wile E. Coyote, Fruity Pebbles, Kangaroos, lots of rainbows, purple Nikes, sleepovers, I think I could go on all night. : )